by Altimese Nichole | Aug 27, 2015 | Learn + Grow
The longer we live, the more things we will experience—both good and bad. The circumstances that we face help surface our true character while building resilience in the process. When dealing with disappointment, our response can determine the direction of how those experiences will impact us in the long run.
If you ever find yourself stuck on disappointment, here are a few ways to cope through the process:
- Focus on the bigger picture
Many times, the things we encounter are minor in comparison to the bigger picture. Never forget that. If you face disappointment with your friends, children, spouse or co-workers, ask yourself “does this matter to the bigger picture?” Would the disagreement matter one year from now? How about one month? If it’s not a deal-breaker, let it go and focus on the things that matter. Often times, the things that matter aren’t things; they’re people. So, focus on the greater purpose instead of the minor problem.
- Mind over Matter
While talking with a friend about an unfortunate circumstance, I recall hearing him say, “Well it is mind over matter. So if I choose not to mind, it won’t matter.” I remember thinking…. WHAT?! What in the world was he saying? Is he saying that he can mentally make a situation so minuscule in our minds that it will be as if it’s non-existent? Absolutely. Our minds are powerful tools and the true battlefield within our head—not on this earth. When facing resistance in life, many times we make it into something much bigger… mentally. By choosing to master our thoughts toward the external circumstances, we’re ultimately choosing to master the power that the circumstance has within our lives.
- Address your feelings with Honesty and Respect
Although we shouldn’t base our behaviors on our feelings, it’s vital for us to address how we feel as it happens. When we fail to tend to our feelings, they appear as outlets in other ways and areas in our lives. Our feelings deserve validity and value. Address how you’re feeling and get to the WHY behind the feeling. Cleanse your heart and embrace the feeling you’ve experienced, then move forward with a pure heart and clear intentions.
- Surround yourself with Positivity
When things don’t go as planned, most of us have a tendency to shut out the world. We pull ourselves away from others to get ourselves together. It’s a good thing to step back for a moment to reflect, but it’s also imperative that we surround ourselves with positive things and people. It reminds us that in the midst of trouble, we’re still surrounded by beautiful things and people that we can appreciate. It also helps us to maintain a grateful mindset through the storm.
Disappointment is inevitable so using these things to help maintain a positive perspective is key. We may not be able to change our circumstances but we can change how we respond to those situations.
In the mist of challenging times, practice these four things and remember the beautiful words of the serenity prayer:
by Altimese Nichole | Aug 27, 2015 | Learn + Grow
In today’s society, everything is about convenience. From parallel parking to everything being at your fingertips through mobile apps— we’re all about making things in life easier. But somewhere along the lines of evolving technology and self-parking cars, the concept of creating shortcuts became a perceived reality for making your dreams come true.
Don’t believe the hype. Short cuts do not exist when it comes to pursuing your dreams. Someone once told me “I’m asking God to show me my purpose in life, but I just don’t want to work weekends, holidays, and I prefer to be finished with work at a decent hour.” They conveyed their desires to go after their purpose believed that those goals should be attainable within those parameters.
This is an example of the deception in action.
Pursuing your dreams take work, effort, sweat, and a lot of tears along the way. If walking into your purpose was easy, everyone would do it. More individuals will respond to the voice within their hearts that direct them to make their dreams a reality. Truth be told, there are no short cuts or convenient pathways to achieving your goals and you have to ask yourself, how bad do you want it? If you seek your goal (let’s call it plan A) but create another just in case (consider that plan B)—you truly don’t want that original goal bad enough to invest all of your faith and effort into it.
Be honest with yourself and ask yourself how badly do you want it, trust the voice within to believe that the dream is in your heart to be shared with the world, then have confidence in yourself to push aside the fear and doubt—and go! No short cuts necessary.
by Altimese Nichole | Aug 18, 2015 | Learn + Grow
Everyone has special gifts to give to the world. They tend to come in beautiful packages that we consider dreams. The dreams we have within can help motivate us to be our best authentic selves, while inspiring others in the world to do the same. Here are five tips to help you manifest your dreams…
1.) Write them down.
There is a reason why the Bible tells us to “Write the vision and make it plain…” (Habakkuk 2:2). It’s one thing to have a vision in your heart—it’s another thing to write that dream on paper. The act of writing activates the universe and puts your dream into the atmosphere. From a personal perspective, I actually write my vision everywhere. I change my passwords to reflect my upcoming victory, write affirmations on the bathroom mirror, and I speak it out loud daily to remind myself that manifestation is coming. Writing solidifies your dream and makes it more than just a thought or wish: it becomes a goal.
2.) See yourself where you desire to be and live your life as if it’s already manifested.
Does this sound funny to you? Good. Everything in our lives begins with our thoughts. Those thoughts lead to words, and words lead to actions that create behavior and habit. If you desire to be a wife, begin to live your life as if you’re already a wife. Do you desire a promotion at your job? With clear intent, visualize yourself in your new role. How will you respond to co-workers, dress, manage your time, and prioritize your tasks? By living out your dream, the universe cannot help but follow your actions.
3.) Learn to love self-discipline.
It’s not a secret. Following your dreams takes hard work, dedication, and a lot of self-discipline. True success will require time, effort and sacrifice—and you must be willing to accept and embrace this. If fulfilling your dreams were easy, everyone would do it. What separates highly successful people apart from all others is the intense amount of discipline. Train yourself to love the focus and choose become every intentional with your life.
4.) Protect your dream from dream killers
When you make the decision to follow your dreams, it’s exciting! Our natural instinct is to tell the world about the amazing vision we have and share our excitement with others in our lives. It’s always great to confide in those you trust but be mindful that not all people will support you or be happy for your new revelation. Protect your dream by using wisdom when sharing your vision with others. The wisdom will help you pick wisely when sharing, and assist you with how much should be shared.
5) Remember that eagles soar alone
As you get closer to your dreams and goals, your circle of friends shift and that’s okay. It’s an indicator that you’re on the right track. Many say that birds of a feather flock together—but remember that eagles soar alone. Embrace the solitude you may experience through your journey. Everyone cannot travel the path with you so accepting your journey, whether your have many or few is vital.
When following these tips, remember that feelings of fear will happen along the way. Be courageous and brave by continuing to move forward regardless of the feelings you feel. Keep going because your dreams were placed in your heart for a reason. Make them your reality.
What are some things and tips that you can share for helping you fulfill your dreams?
XOXO
by Altimese Nichole | Aug 18, 2015 | Learn + Grow
In life—especially for women, it’s so easy to take care and nurture others while forgetting to nurture yourself. The older we become and the more responsibilities that we are blessed with, we place ourselves lower on the list of priorities. We begin to guilt ourselves into believing that it’s okay to not worry about our well-being. We find ourselves saying things like, “As long as they’re okay then I’m okay.”
In the midst of telling ourselves this sweet little lie, our love tank depletes more and more— with no deposits of restoration. We all have a love tank and within that love tank we have deposits and withdrawals. If we’re always taking out to give to others, how do we replenish the reservoir? I encourage you to take care of your most valuable player: you. It becomes really hard to give others what we fail to give to ourselves. Taking care of you doesn’t have to be extremely time consuming! It can be simple gestures that you do for yourself to says, “you matter.”
Here are some tips that can help inspire you of ways to show yourself daily gratitude.
Morning coffee or Tea
There is something truly miraculous about the first sip of coffee in the morning! It reminds you that you’re alive—and it’s all okay. Make it a point to get up a little earlier to sip your coffee in peace. If you’re not a coffee drinker, start your day with tea or lemon water (which has amazing health benefits, by the way).
Morning Prayer and Meditation
Mediation has become so popular in society because it calms the soul in a chaotic world. It’s a spiritual act of becoming grounded within. You don’t need a studio or a fitness center. YouTube morning yoga sessions and thousands of options will appear. While becoming spiritually grounded, add prayer to the mix and it not only grounds you but makes your heart open to today’s possibilities vs. yesterday’s disappointments.
Homemade facial
Take a little extra time in the morning or evening to pamper yourself through your everyday routine! Add essential oils like Lavender at night or Peppermint in the day to boost the experience. One of my favorite homemade facials are easy and timeless!
Take time to read a book
Many people protest their lack of time for reading but the reality is— there is always time. Become aware of the time you spend throughout the day browsing social sites or watching television. Don’t eliminate it but cut out at least one hour for dedicated reading time. If that doesn’t work- try during your morning time. You will truly be surprise the amount of time we spend… wasting time. Need recommendations? Check out the “She Reads” section of KnowYourStrong.org and be inspired!
These are just samples of the MANY things you can do to take care of you in the midst of managing all of your responsibilities. Women are amazing because of our capabilities; own your awesomeness with grace, and take care of you.
Check out the amazing health benefits of essential oils here and choose some of your favorite homemade facials here!
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