She Connects: The Disguise of Aloha

She Connects: The Disguise of Aloha

In general, as Americans, I do not think that a single one of us can claim that we have nothing to be grateful for. We are privileged. Especially for me, as a Colorado born woman living in Hawaii amongst many cultures, some indigenous and others from overseas, I am constantly reminded of how privileged I am. Hawaii is a common ground for many who traveled here generations ago to work for the Dole Plantation, or for local farms and some for the cane fields. These are cultures that derived from third world countries, where poverty was their motivation to flee to the land of Aloha, out of a necessary means to provide for their families. This molded Hawaii into a hub that is desperately clinging to its Hawaiian traditions, while there is a wide variety of cultures embarking on it. I heard someone describe Hawaii as “A third world country, with first world amenities.” Many see Hawaii only in movies or in pictures in magazines, but the reality of Hawaii is so different than many will ever know, and it takes living amongst the people to fully understand it. My husband is a local boy who grew up on the North Shore of Oahu. His favorite memories involve his dad fishing with him early in the morning, tending to his roosters, and living in Haleiwa in a communal home with his entire multigenerational family and only fire to heat the water for their single outdoor shower.

My husband is a man, that came from a life that some would describe as little or maybe even lacking, but with his big heart and open eyes, he sees his life growing up as having everything. He grew up having the values of a world that has long been passed on the mainland and usually is only found in small farming communities. They value family above all and honor God with their thankfulness no matter what. This is what drew me in about the Islands, the people. This is what is TRUE Hawaii is.

It is no secret that living in Hawaii is hard. With prices of food, the ratio of supply and demand with housing out of balance, and the difficulty in finding suitable work, making a living is better described as, “Completely remolding your standard of living”. I for one have gone from my single days in Colorado in a 1 bedroom apartment for about $500 a month right in the heart of the most desirable part of town, to now looking for a rental, for my WHOLE family, and considering a 1 Bedroom apartment, for over $1800 a month. For most, when they realize that remolding standards and changing life styles are a necessity to survive here, they usually decide to leave. Like I said, Hawaii is not only what you see in the Magazines. Others, like us, come to a point where they see what Hawaii is about, and they deem it as necessary to be where their souls feel called. And the life style change for me has been a wonderful process of simplification that I think many could benefit from. Leaning on God has been something I have struggled with for years and now, slowly God is working on my heart, gently as He always is. I cannot even count the amount of times where my husband and I looked at each other knowing full well that our bank account and ice box were empty, and prayed that we could make it another week in this condition. Seems impossible, even to me sometimes, but with out fail every time God stretches our food, and reminds me that the Spirit of Aloha is abundant here in Hawaii. I cannot even count the number of times our family has been invited to a cook out and my husband’s aunty will send us home with enough home cooked food to last us through until the next pay day, in fact she insists and will pile your arms full of food as you’re walking out the door, simultaneously kissing you on the cheek. If that weren’t a blessing enough, our neighbors and friends continually bless us with fruit, avocados, mangoes, eggs, and the funny thing is, is that we haven’t told any of them that we were worried about having food to put on the table. This is the culture in Hawaii. It is hard for everyone here, and yet everyone gives and shares and cares for their family, their neighbors, their friends, and people they do not even know.

The spirit of Aloha I have no doubt is just another name for the Holy Spirit. Every time I return to the homeland, I will step off the plane and the Holy Spirit will sweep over me and uncontrollable tears of Joy flow, sometimes with out me even realizing! On the days that the pressure of life seems to get to me and my husband, we will stop what we’re doing, head to the beach to catch a sunset and in that moment, God gently reminds us the TRUTH of His amazing presence we have unlimited access to! The indigenous flowers here have time and time again been used for the Lord to speak to me, to guide me, and to fill my heart with so much joy. Hawaii, is not like it is in movies or in magazines, because if you live here, and you struggle here, and you bond together with the local people, then you know that it is so, so much better! I wouldn’t want to live anywhere else right now and I am so grateful that God continues to be our provision in EVERY aspect of our lives! I pray that more people get to experience this Spirit of Aloha and that it contagiously spreads for generations to come!

Mahalo Nui Loa,

Kiersten

She Inspires: Who’s Your Real MVP?

She Inspires: Who’s Your Real MVP?

For about a year now there’s been this saying going around: “You’re The Real MVP.” It’s extremely popular and people use it for even the silliest situations. For example, if someone goes and gets the group pizza, the group will say something like: “Thanks, you’re the real MVP.” However the saying originated from an amazing speech given by basketball player Kevin Durant, when he won the NBA’s Most Valuable Player Award for the 2013-2014 basketball season. In the speech, he talks about his mother and the sacrifices she made to make sure her sons were fed, clothed, off the streets and being set up for success. He ends it by telling her that she’s the real MVP and the crowd applauds him while his mother is moved to tears.

This speech led me to think about who’s my MVP? Who, without their help and guidance, would I be completely lost without? Who goes above and beyond for me that I often overlook or forget to express my gratitude towards? We all survive because of other people who help us. This could be helping us with our children, helping us with our spiritual lives, helping us during hard times, and helping us by being a helping hand whenever we need one. It’s so important to appreciate the people who are actively involved in your life and to let them know that they are your MVP. I believe your MVP can change from year to year. At times, it can be your parents and as you grow older it may change to a helpful spouse or a dedicated friend, either way let’s show these people that we value them.

This week I want you to identify your MVP. Who is your Most Valuable Player? After you identify them, come up with something you can do for them that shows your appreciation. Be creative, have fun, and GO BIG! Be generous with how you show your MVP your appreciation and love! Let them know you’re thankful for all their help this year and maybe even previous years and that you wouldn’t have made it without them!

With love and big smiles,

torrie

She Connects: Manage Your Thoughts, Leverage Your Gratitude

She Connects: Manage Your Thoughts, Leverage Your Gratitude

Within the Word of God, Proverbs 23: 7 says, “As a [wo]man thinketh, so is [s]he.” Everything in our lives begin with our thoughts. No matter how great (or devastating) our circumstances can be, we have the power to shape and shift perspective through the thoughts we focus on. The more we think about things, people, or circumstances (no matter good or bad), the more they can have an impact on our lives long after past moments occurred.

To increase blessings and gratitude in our lives, we must meditate on the things that are good and positive in our lives. Many people allow external circumstances to dictate the internal state of being. However, we’re designed to produce, manifest, and have dominion over external things (not to merely be subjects reacting to external situations). The more we set our mind to things that are pleasing, the more we manifest good things into our reality.

Want more to be thankful for? Start thinking of the things that spark a heart of gratitude!

Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow. ~Melody Beattie

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She Empowers: 20 Somethings For The 20 Something Soul

She Empowers: 20 Somethings For The 20 Something Soul

Dear 20 something soul,

Something #7

APPRECIATE THE PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE.

The sad truth about this life is that we never know when it’s going to end. Life is completely unpredictable and who is by your side today could be gone tomorrow. That’s why it’s absolutely vital that you learn to appreciate the people who are in your life and make your life better!! It could be your parents, your sibling’s, your friends, your grandparents, your husband, your fiancé, or maybe even your children! These are precious people in your life and even though it seems like we will all live forever we won’t. Take the time to show these people how thankful you are for them and how you appreciate their presence in your life. Write a thank you note, take someone out for a dinner that’s on you, pay for a spa day, or even simply spend time that is 100% dedicated to them and not you checking your social media accounts. People matter, take the time to let them know it.

Till next time,

20 something soul

She Empowers: Maintaining a Grateful Heart in the Midst of Hard Times

She Empowers: Maintaining a Grateful Heart in the Midst of Hard Times

In life, it’s so easy to express appreciation and gratitude when things are going well, all of our loved ones are healthy, and the journey is going smoothly. However, what about the times when it seems like our backs are against the wall, our children are sick, and it appears as if there is no end to the chaos?

Here are some tactics that can help you maintain a heart of gratefulness while dealing with moments of difficulty:

  1. Mediate on Good Things

When facing hard times, we often worry about the outcome which leads to us speaking about our concerns. This actually places more focus on the issue instead of minimizing its presence in our lives. When going through a trail, be intentional about your thoughts. Cast your cares and mediate on the good things in your life—even if that’s simply focusing on the gift of life in your body. By mediating on good things, your problems will receive less of your attention and your gratitude will supersede its presence.

 

  1. Be Intentional with Time

Difficult circumstances make it hard to maintain positivity and focus on the other great things in our lives. It can be easy to simply flow through your days but these are the times that intention matters. Going with the flow creates an environment that is reactive vs. proactive. Come deliberate with your time and what you choose to focus on. Spend more time reading books that address how successful people overcome and less time watching reality TV drama. Become self-aware of the thoughts you have—cast down the negative ones by replacing them with counter thoughts that create positivity. If we truly attended to personal growth and development as we should (in addition to our normal roles and responsibilities), we would have no time for condemnation and self-pity.

 

  1. Volunteer

A few years ago, I volunteered at a women’s shelter in the city of Atlanta. We provided a nail spa day for the ladies and many of the women shared their stories with the volunteers. One woman shared with me that she graduated from Howard University with a Communications degree and worked at some of the most reputable household and entertainment brands. During the course of her career, she connected with a group of people who introduced her to drugs (one of those drugs was crack/cocaine). As a result, she lost her home, her job, and ultimately the life she knew. Through it all, she had such a huge heart full or gratitude. She spoke with me with tears in her eyes through the pain and a smile on her face because of her gratitude. She said that she no longer gets to pamper herself, especially with manicures so my attention toward her made her day.

 

Spending time with her and many of the women who had similar stories reminded me of grace and mercy. Through all of my situations that I was facing, it was only because of grace and mercy that I wasn’t me. I am no different from her. WE are no different. That one experience changed my perspective for the better, helping me realized that we should never take anything for granted. Even when things seem at their worst, we can always find a glimpse of hope and gratitude.

 

  1. Create a Gratitude Jar

Have you heard of a gratitude jar? It’s a DIY project that can spark creativity while taking your mind off of today’s issues. Additionally, once the actual jar is designed to your liking, you write thing that you’re grateful for on little sheets of paper. Do this whenever you think of it and have the time so when you need a pick-me-up, you can reach for your jar and read the things you’re grateful for. I put dates on mine to help me remember the great things through my journey.

 

Here’s an example of a gratitude jar. You can also create a gratitude journal (these actually exist for those who are not DIY’ers) or a faith book which highlights favorite scriptures, faith testimonies, and answered prayers.

 

What are some of the things that help you maintain gratitude through difficult storms?

 

ALTIMESE - asig

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